Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Time

Now that it is May, it’s officially my birthday month. A couple years back it was one of the best months of my life. It was so much fun planning the combined 50^th and my daughter’s 21^st birthday trip to New York City. Every time I made mention that my 50^th birthday was coming up, a participant in my fitness classes would show up next class with a card and/or a small gift. I got cheers and hoots when repeatedly stating that I felt awesome turning 50. I proclaimed that 50 was the new 50, and loved every minute of the attention I drew to myself. My daughter was actually the one who proclaimed I was really milking the whole birthday month thing. It was oddly as fun as anticipating my 21st birthday.

Several years ago, I met one of my bestie girlfriends for a trail walk. It was close to my birthday and before hugging goodbye she said, “oh, I have something for you.” It was a clay pot full of herbs. The pot had broken somewhere along the way so she had stopped and picked up a second pot to set the whole thing in. We had a laugh and a hug and a ‘happy birthday, Jo!’ moment.

I still have that starter pot of herbs. I have replaced a few plants over the years that didn’t weather the winter. I have moved on to a different pot.  Yet, I still think of the thoughtful gift from a good friend every time I pluck something out of the little garden.

The year after my most awesome birthday month ever, I cried on my birthday, a lot. My birthday never went by without a call and card from my Mom. She was gone. When my girlfriends called, I cried on their shoulder. I actually snot nose blubbered. I think I went through ½ a box of tissue that day. I really missed that phone call, yet I am sure I never really appreciated it like I should have.

As I look back on past celebrations, there really isn’t a pattern. Honey used to throw big family parties for me until I asked him to stop. Though it really disappointed my Mom, it just wasn’t how I wanted to spend my day. Some years we have made it a point to go to dinner. I spent my 40th in Las Vegas. And, I spent my 21st in Vegas. And, well, a few other years in Vegas, too. Sometimes it’s a barbecue on the patio with friends. Recently it was the Big Apple.

Life is a lot like my experience with birthdays. Sometimes there is awesome joy; sometimes there is an ugly cry. It doesn’t look the same year to year. The lesson I have learned is that I can give myself permission to break a pattern, try something new or repeat the same plan depending on the moment, so that in the end I have the time of MY life.

How do you celebrate your birthday? Leave me note. I would love to hear more about you.